# weekly reflection 11 - modeling There is an issue that is prevalent in education that we don't talk about very often. That is where the adults in the school bully the kids. To me, this is unacceptable. There's been a lot said about power dynamics and control in the classroom, and my own experience as a youth shows that some adults can exert too much control in a classroom. We do a poor job of teaching kids that they matter or that they have inherent value. We treat them as though they don’t. Although every educator loves to say they are there for the kids, schools are not designed for kids, they are designed for the adults. This is evidenced by Bell (2003): "They consistently report that the main message they get from the adult world is that they are not as important as adults; they do not feel that they are taken seriously; they have little or no power." It's vital that we as the adults intentionally choose to model appropriate behavior, expectations, interactions, and relationships. It's a tall order, but one we should live up to and seek to accomplish, for whether we intend to or not, we are modeling for our students, so we might as well model appropriately. As Berkowitz says, there are two ways to teach appropriate behavior to students, "One is to increase the likelihood that the people they encounter in the school community are positive role models. The other is to expose them to depictions of role models, e.g., in literature and history" (Location 3188, 2019). I would argue that modeling in school is most important because kids will have a hard time recognizing good character in the literature if they never see it in their school environment. And there are other ways to model good character as well. As this extends to the adults treating other adults with respect as well. This even extends to the hiring phase. "Some principals write their philosophy of education, essentially a Priorities manifesto or statement of Noble Purpose, describing the kind of school they are trying to nurture and shepherd" (Location 3218, Berkowitz. 2019) In one of my schools, our focus was personalizing learning. My interview questions when hiring teachers were all about Personalized Learning. I even asked how willing teachers were to buy into our mission. One time I even ended an interview early when the teacher said she was just interviewing everywhere she could just to get any teaching job. Our school would not be a good fit for her. So I stopped the interview because I knew she was just looking for a job, she wasn't going to buy in to what we were doing. An interesting idea is the idea that adults become close enough to students that they feel like a family. This is a misguided notion that always makes me think in my mind, "Oh, like a family, so we are able to treat each other terribly, forced to spend time together, and yet, still love each other, somehow." Lickona highlights one particular class where they feel like a family: > His students talk of how the class is “a family,” how they don’t come late, how they have straightened themselves out and gotten their grades up, and how they work hard for Mr. Rose because he cares about them and they don’t want to let him down. They are learning about the meaning of respect and love by experiencing them firsthand. (Location 1510) Contrast with Gottfredson (2022) who states that a family is the most basic level representing mind 1.0, we are a team represents mind 2.0, and we add value to each other is mind 3.0. This alternative perspective shows that what we think we value highly is, according to Gottfredson, merely the ticket to enter the game, and we can be so much better. ## References - Berkowitz, M. W. (2021). _PRIMED for character education: Six design principles for school improvement_ (Kindle ed). Routledge. - Gottfredson, R. K. (2022). _The Elevated Leader: Level Up Your Leadership Through Vertical Development_. Morgan James Publishing. * Lickona, T. (1992). _Educating for character: How our schools can teach respect and responsibility_ (Kindle ed). Bantam Books. * Bell, J. (2003). _Understanding Adultism A Key to Developing Positive Youth-Adult Relationships_. [https://www.nuatc.org/articles/pdf/understanding_adultism.pdf](https://www.nuatc.org/articles/pdf/understanding_adultism.pdf)